An afternoon decision
by mydearone
Summary: Lord Grantham cannot get her out of his mind, even after all these years. He makes his mind up to do something about it.
1. Chapter 1

An afternoon dream

The sun was shining and a slight breeze spread itself across the air and touched Robert's face as he sat on the bench under the one of the big elm oaks near below the house that was so much bigger. He closed his eyes for a moment and then he remembered….

The kiss…., or more correctly, the kisses….because there had been at least three times.

All at once, after all this time and all this years, it came back to him and hit him in his heart and stomach; this tingling strong and delightful emotion that had appeared every time he had been in her presence those years ago. And every time he had thought about her in the following years.

Why it did he could never figure out. He loved his wife and daughters so much. Since the tragic loss of his youngest daughter and Matthew life had been quite different. There had been ups and downs; but all in all a lot of good things even though Robert had never been good at changes. But life had been good to him. So why was it that he had experienced these feelings and thoughts that never seemed to quite go away?

As he sat there with his eyes closed it was as if her lips were suddenly close to his and her sweet smell was in the air. He felt an enormous longing and desire for her as if she was there for real. He couldn't help himself but speak out her name with a low voice….._Jane…._

Some minutes later as he walked towards the house again he made his mind up to finally do something about it. He had been thinking about her for so long that he needed to know that she at least was all right.

He had once asked Anna about her because he knew that the two maids had been close friends while Jane had been working at Downton. So he thought they had kept in touch even after she had left.

And Anna had confirmed that Jane managed as a help at the Swann Inn, and that she still lived in the village. But what she did or where she was now he didn't know.

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The next day Lord Grantham was headed for the village. He walked with determined steps. After all nobody could say anything for wanting to know something about one of his former staff members. No-one could say he didn't care. And what else was he about to do this day?

Cora and Isobel had left for New York to stay some time with Cora's mother and brother over there. Lady Edith was in London to take care of Mr Gregson's newspaper and affairs. And Lady Mary was quite occupied with the business of the estate while switching the attention from her many suitors.

As he reached the place where The Swann Inn was situated and he took notice of the sign outside the door, Robert felt a mixture of excitement and fear. Excitement about the thought that he soon could be standing face to face with her again, and fear about the nagging feeling that this wasn't quite right. But then again he didn't care at this moment. He just wanted to know something about her and maybe see her if he could…He had to.

He closed the door behind him and walked over to the reception desk. –"Excuse me, is there a woman by the name of Jane working here?" he asked to the young girl behind the desk. She looked up at the nice face in front of her. –"Yes, sir, there is. If you mean Mrs Moorsum. But she is not here yet; she is about to start work in half an hour," the girl answered. Robert felt an enormous relief that Jane still had the same surname. That meant she at least hadn't gotten married again.

-"If you want to wait, sir, there are some tables over there,"the girl said and made a gesture over to the other side with her hand. –"Well, thank you, miss,"Lord Grantham answered and smiled at her. Then he went outside and over to the other side of the street. He placed himself under some big trees and started to walk slowly back and forth while keeping an eye with the Inn right opposite from him. There he could see who came and went.

After some minutes his heart started to beat a bit faster as he saw a familiar figure approaching the Inn. He stopped walking and he glanced over at her direction for some seconds. Robert noticed that her walk slowed down as she suddenly met his gaze from the other side of the street. And all at once it was as if the world stopped. All the sounds and images were gone. And there were just the two of them there.

It was as if many minutes passed, even though it didn't. As Jane slowly regained her conscience she felt an enormous surprise about seeing _him _there along with the emotions only he could awake in her again. She felt her heart beat several tic faster and the tingling in her heart and stomach was automatically there.

From across the street Robert could see the familiar blinking in her eyes, which revealed when she was nervous about something. And he had always thought that was quite charming. He placed on a little smile and gave a sign as a request for her to come over to his side of the street. –"Jane, can you please come over to me?"he asked.

Jane blinked again and looked to each side to see if the road was clear. Then she hurried over and stopped about one meter away from him unable to look up at him. -"Mylord,"was the only thing she could manage. –"Jane, please look at me,"he said with a begging tone in his voice. He took one step closer and he so much wanted to take her in his arms right then and there. But he couldn't. Not there and then.

As Jane slowly lifted her head to face him she recognized his defeated but warm look. And those firm blue eyes of his that she could never forget. –"Jane, I just had to know how you were doing. If you are well or if you need anything." –"Are you well, Jane?" His voice was almost desperate. And she noticed that he nearly was about to lift his arm to touch her, but then he remembered where they were.

-"Yes, mylord, I am fine, thank you,"she answered politely_. Oh how beautiful she is_, Robert thought to himself as he studied her face. So many times he had dreamt of being with her; talking to her, touching her….And now she finally stood in front of him….after all these years.

-"Oh Jane…", he began. He swallowed hard; his mouth felt dry. –"There are so many things I want to say to you,"he continued. –"I have thought about you so many times and wanted to get in touch with you…but I couldn't, Jane,"he said. –"Please forgive me for that. I want you to know how many times the sweet memory of you, Jane, has helped me through many hard times. But you are not just a memory…"

Robert stopped for a while starring at her. –"You are my precious, beautiful Jane,"he declared while starring desperately into her flickering eyes.

-"Oh please, mylord…Robert…, don't say that. I cannot bear to go through it all over again if it can't come to something else. Please…"Jane begged, almost with tears in her eyes.

-"Oh, but Jane…," he began as he suddenly took her hand and led her behind one of the big trees a couple of meters from the street. There he almost pressed her up against the tree. –"I do want this finally to move forward, Jane. I want you in my life. I have had feelings for you for so long now, but I couldn't do anything." He came so close to her that she felt his warm breath to her face.

-"I _love _you, Jane," he said. His voice was hoarse. Jane felt as if she was going to faint. And then he pressed his lips tenderly against hers. As he felt her hands move up to his neck he wrapped his arms around her waist and he deepened the kiss. And back in Jane's mind she wondered about how on earth she was going to manage this afternoon's work….

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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_As somebody reviewed here, they don't ship adultery, neither do I. But if people really looked, they would see that there was a very special, pure and mature chemistry between Jane and Robert. And since Mr. Fellowes brought it on, there had to be consequences._

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The embrace did not last for so long. But those seconds it did was enough to put Jane totally on fire. Robert's tender, but at the same time, demanding kiss was so good and sweet to her, that she felt as if she was in another galaxy.

But it had hit them both that they were not alone, not here in the street, and not far from Jane's work. –"I have to go to begin my work, milord," she said stuttering. –"Yes, of course you do," Robert answered. They were both infatuated by what had happened. Robert had let go of her. –"But Jane, I want see you again…I must see you again." –"Are you available tomorrow?" he asked.

-"Yes, I start my work in the afternoon, same as now. So I have the hours free in the morning," Jane answered. She then invited him to come to her place the next morning and gave him her address.

-"I most certainly will, Jane," Robert answered and gave her a little smile before she ran over the street again and inside the door to start working. Robert looked after her until she was out of sight, and then he took a look around him to make sure no-one had seen them.

As he started his walk back to Downton, the feeling of the kiss still burned on his mouth and in his heart. The desire and longing for her grew stronger by the minute. Robert had never felt something this strong. He knew it was dangerous and not correct. But it felt so right….

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Early the morning after Jane was up and ready for Robert's visit. She could only hope he had not changed his mind. She thought about his dilemma; the situation was certainly not easy. He was an Earl; he was married and had his family. He had his reputation to think of. She knew all this, as she had for so long, even before she had left the Abbey and after.

The last thing she wanted was to ruin things for anybody. But she knew that somebody also was about to get hurt in this. That's why she had left Downton all those years ago, and that was why she had tried the hardest possible to suppress her feelings about Lord Grantham. But she couldn't. It had all been in vain. When she had seen him there yesterday her heart had nearly exploded with those tingling, strong emotions. And how she had managed through the day at work was a mystery.

Suddenly there was a slight knock on the door, and Jane hurried over to it feeling her heart jumped in her chest. She couldn't help but bust into a big smile when she saw him standing outside. As soon as he was inside, Jane closed the door properly behind him. –"Oh Robert, I was afraid you weren't coming," she said. –"Afraid you had changed your mind…."she added.

Robert closed the distance between them and stroked tenderly one of her cheeks. –"My sweet girl, I could never…," he began. –"Earlier I might have, but not now. I will no longer miss the opportunity to be with you, Jane," he continued. –"I have never felt anything like this. My thoughts have been going over and over about what to do. I know it is not the right thing toward my wife or the rest of my family. It's not what anyone would expect of me. But these feelings are too strong to deny, Jane, "he said.

He pulled her closer to himself. –"The feelings I have for you, Jane, are trilling, magic and pure," he almost whispered before his mouth met her sensual, waiting lips. Jane couldn't help but let out a moan as he deepened the kiss. She still couldn't believe that he was actually there, with her. But it was real, and finally true.

She led him to her quarter and to her bed, where they finally made their long-desired and wanted love. Neither one of them could compare anything to what they experienced in that moment. And as Jane finally let out the words she had waited so long to say to him, Robert realized right then how much he had wanted to hear _I love you, Robert,_ only from her. –"And I love you, Jane,"Robert answered, his voice filled with emotion.

He knew now that it would be very hard for them to part after that special moment. How could he leave her now? The only thing he wanted was to be with her for the rest of his life. And it was in that same moment he decided to make some changes in his life.


End file.
